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Old 01-09-2017, 06:21 PM
Electronic M's Avatar
Electronic M Electronic M is offline
M is for Memory
 
Join Date: Jan 2011
Location: Pewaukee/Delafield Wi
Posts: 14,762
Thank you for coming around to discussing this in a civil respectful manner. I sincerely appreciate it.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ohohyodafarted View Post
You see Tom that's the crux of the problem. It seems you can't see the forest for the trees. Your own blind opinion is all you seem to see. Your communication skills lack the tact you need to express a thought without stepping on the toes of someone else.
Yes, I'm aware my social skills sometimes lack sufficient tact especially in a non-face-to-face dialog. There have been many times I've seen red and almost just outright tore various people a new one for being rude to me, and the like, and on many occasions I've stepped back from that re-read what got on my nerves and my previous response, and walked things back to reasonable or even diplomatic standards...Some of the better examples are not public. We are all human, Bob...I'm sure you've accidentally stepped on peoples' toes your self from time to time. We can't always be prefect, and when life gets/hard frustrating it becomes all the more challenging not sounding as cranky as like makes one feel...I do try to give people the benefit of the doubt, but if I've argued before with someone and their commentary seems unjustly insulting it becomes substantially harder to respond diplomatically.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ohohyodafarted View Post
To presuppose that you know better than someone else who has intimate, first hand knowledge of a situation, is equivalent to saying "hey stupid, you should have done it this way" That IS arrogant and disrespectful. I understand that there is no love lost between you and I. That is just the way it is, and I am just fine with that.
I've never seen or heard it framed that way (or mentally tried to frame it as such)...I guess maybe with tone stripped from context, and a bit of lingering grudge against the author I could see such a comment being a bit disrespectful (but darn is it hard to see it being that bad).
Bob, none of us knows everything. I see people here regularly point dumb minutia out to each other in ways that by your standard could be interpreted as MUCH more arrogant and disrespectful...I think you would be well served to thicken your skin a bit, and try not to always look for the worst possible interpretation...The world will feel like a nicer place if you do, and you'll come across as being more friendly.
Also since I can't know or think of everything, I have no problem with people implying to me (as you think I did to you) "hey stupid, you should have done it this way" when I'm not doing something in the best way possible...It happens and I'm humble enough to know that even if I lived the lifetime of every member here past and present, had all their knowledge and experience, and gave everything I did 100%, that there would STILL eventually be some moment where I'd inadvertantly do something wrong enough to deserve being told directly with zero tact "hey stupid, you should have done it this way"...That is how life works, and I would consider myself truly arrogant if I ever decided that there is zero chance of me ever being badly wrong in the future (and thus above correction/reproach).
I'm not one to mince words or hide my intent behind a double meaning or implication, if I really mean "hey stupid, you should have done it this way" I'll will say "hey stupid, you should have done it this way" with no words minced, and hidden behind nothing.
Bob the only one keeping bad blood between us is you. I'm fine letting bygones be bygones...I'm not one to hold grudges if folks that did give me crap decide to stop doing so and be civil.
That said much of what you slung in that CT-100 thread was justified...I had a rare lapse back then and climbed up on a high horse and started taking shots I had no business or reason to make, and for that I am sorry.
I'm also sorry that you saw what I wrote as meaning "hey stupid, you should have done it this way" that was not even remotely what I was trying to say, and I'm sorry if it had that meaning to you.
We all come from different frames of reference and different personal experience, and different things push our buttons in ways that are not always universally obvious to all.


Quote:
Originally Posted by ohohyodafarted View Post
So the next time you make comments where I am involved, I respectfully request that unless you can take the time to sit back and carefully construct your thoughts, with the goal in mind that your post may be interpreted in a negative manner; then you should consider not posting at all.
99% of the time including the post here that set you off I post with that exact mind set (leave no room for negative interpretation)...We are not all of the same mind set, generation, experience upbringing, etc so it is not always guaranteed that we will know every thing to avoid to the end of not bothering anyone. I'm not going to stop posting, since VK is the one of the only things interesting enough to keep me from going crazy from boredom. And the one of the only places where I can have a cogent conversation about tube tech, which is something I absolutely need to regularly do (lest I be found wandering aimlessly, babbling to my self about electronics ).

Quote:
Originally Posted by ohohyodafarted View Post
In fact please, just do yourself a big favor by not commenting on anything where I am involved. Because if I read something you post that involves a post that I made; and I find that post personally offensive or disparaging, I will be sure to call you out on it.
I have no intention of disparaging you (nor did I intend to in this thread prior to you calling me arrogant), but if I see you take shots at me or other hobbyists with differing tastes (or breaking rues) I will call you on it (as a moderator it is my job to do so). I will post where I see fit or have interest...If you happen to be in the thread, please be civil, and try not to interpret my posts in the worse possible manner. I have no intention of stepping on your toes so long as you are not conveying the intent of trying to stomp toes.

Quote:
Originally Posted by ohohyodafarted View Post
There is an old saying that discretion is the better part of valor. So with that in mind I shall end this dialogue unless you decide to continue deriding me.
Fair enough, I don't see need to continue either. I hope you do not see any derision in the above post....Since none was meant.
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